Okay, I know she's a pensioner but it must have cost her more to post the cheap plastic keyring that it did to buy it. She works in a charity shop and often buys us really awful presents. We always chuck them away, say thank you and try to appreciate the thought. However, there clearly is no thought in this birthday present. I'd rather she didn't waste her money. How do I tell her this without causing offence? By the way, she buys her other grandaughter my niece,things like dolls and remote controlled robots. She is hampered by having to pay postage. Her presents are now getting insulting in their cheapness, especially as I know she is passing money to my brother, who has a drug habit. I'd rather she just didn't bother anymore. By the way, I am generous – always giving her money. She also works part time.
I'm not expecting big presents. A pen or a pair of socks would be useful! But a cheap novelty keyring! There's clearly no thought in it at all.
I've clearly not worded this well. My mother spends money on my brother and his family – and although I don't like it, I accept it. I don't think she means to be offensive – she's just not thinking straight. I'd rather she sent nothing at all – why should my daughter be so insulted?
There are manyother issues here – my mother is insanely religious and believes that boys are superior to girls. I believe that she doesn't realise how offensive she is and I don't want actually to cause a rift. I'm looking for a way to say "Please don't bother – it's obvious you can't afford it" without causing bad feeling.
And Brad – would you repeat that to my face? It's nice being able to insult people without having to bear the consequences, isn't it?
No Chefling, I would never say that to my daughter. I always say things like: it's the thought that counts!
But this time, she just looked at it and put it down – it really was awful. Her disappointment was clear. Certainly not worth collecting. She's 11. Children should learn to deal with disappontment. but I am outraged on her behalf.
BTW my mother was outraged when my grandmother gave me a cheap pen for my birthday!